Basketball, football, baseball...but not tennis.
Rodney Carrington said it best when he proved how men created
sports because apparently, we get tired of thinking about
pussy 24 hours a day. Football has uprights through the
middle, baseball has the home runs, and basketball is five
guys fighting five other guys for a hole. Just like this
website or your local club.
Yeah, it still doesn't work.
As a college student, I have several stereotypes precede
me, and as a a general rule of thumb, every last one them is
correct. We may be horndogs, but we learned it from our parents,
who invented the Swinging 60s. Because for some damn reason,
back in the day, sex was considered a taboo topic. You'd
never have a little group of women talking about where the
"G" spot is (which does exist in women, guys,
trust me, I've found it several times), or about how
much anal hurts, or why their husbands can never give head.
Fast forward a few decades, and the puritanical views on
sex have been completely fucking destroyed. There was
Playboy still afraid to show an actual puss, punch-bowl
parties where the guests threw the keys into a punch bowl
and the ones you pulled out was the person you went home with.
The Plato's Den, night clubs, and of course, the kids
who came up with "tune in, turn on and drop out"
and "make love, not war."
It's true the last one was an anti-war message to protest
our being in Vietnam, but there are still implications.
But sex was everywhere, almost inescapable, in every state,
every city, every home. Junior was told to be a *good boy*
(nudge nudge, grin grin, wink wink), while Sally Sue was
told to be a good girl. Meaning Junior should fuck every
girl he met on the street, while Sally Sue had to stay at home
and invent the vibrator, to the joy of millions depressed
housewives everywhere.
Double standard there, and it kept Junior from getting
laid, considering every household had the same rules.
So while Sally invented the vibrator, Junior invented
the term "Rosie and her five friends", which
was a virtual orgy of fun! Junior then realized he was growing
hair in places he shouldn't, and was having to wear
glasses, so he dumped Rosie and her friends, and invented
Table Football, which vibrated so much, that Sally became
a big fan of football.
Down the street, little Bobby has no sister, and can't
get laid to save his life, so he invents video games. But
he can hear his mom and dad down the hall, bedsprings squeaking,
headboard banging, mom sounding like dad's proving
his point again.
But then again, maybe every generation needs a Rodney Carrington.
|
|
